Author Archives: Kristiana Page

I Constantly Live in Fear of a New Lupus Flare

Living with lupus makes me feel a little precarious. I can’t fully enjoy the little victories in my health due to the fear that they’ll immediately be followed by a downhill slide. Last year was a doozy: For most of the year, I seemed to move endlessly from one…

The Difference Between Tiredness and Fatigue

Everyone is entitled to a bad day. But for me, “bad” can’t seem to contain itself to just 24 hours. It usually comes in waves that last weeks or months. The defiant optimist in me likes to think that, in a way, I need bad days because they help…

Dealing with the Snowball Effects of the Common Cold

In a previous column, I discussed how there are two polar personalities within my body. There’s the energetic, “anything is possible, never back down, and go-go-go” Kristi. Then there’s the lethargic, down-in-the-dumps version who can’t find the motivation to make herself lunch. I’m usually one or the…

What Lupus Life Is to Me

Mid-conversation, I’m often asked questions that lead to me revealing information the other person isn’t ready to hear about. It involves an unsettling, controversial word. Actually, it’s not just a simple word, but a name: lupus. And then comes an all-important question I hear time and time again. What…

Loving Someone Who Is Forever Evolving

I’m a confessed hopeless romantic. Blame my parents! With 27 years of marriage under their belts and a grand total of 37 years together, I’ve spent my entire life watching a love story unfold. But just like any long-term relationship, their real-life fairy tale hasn’t always been smooth…

Thanks to Lupus, I’m Addicted to Control

I’m an addict. Before you get the wrong idea, I should explain. My addiction isn’t to any type of illicit or prescription drug, it’s not to alcohol, and I don’t even crave caffeine. No, my vice is something else, something harder to attain. I’m addicted to control.

It’s All or Nothing with Lupus

I’m an all-or-nothing kind of person emotionally. If you ask how I am, you won’t ever hear me answer “all right.” I’m always good, great, or the polar opposite — in which case, I’m too “in my feelings” to reply. When studying or learning a skill, I’m either…

Looking into the Future with Lupus

They say the only things guaranteed in life are death and taxes. I’m lucky enough to add one more certainty to the list: lupus. Ironically, being certain about lupus only means being entirely uncertain about everything else in my life. When someone asks what my life will look…