Columns

Right and wrong ways to navigate a patient-doctor relationship

Like any relationship, a patient-doctor one has rules about how to engage and communicate. They’re typically in writing, bearing the patient’s signature of agreement. I’ve seen the rules posted on walls as the U.S. Patient Bill of Rights and Responsibilities, but there are also unspoken rules around trust and admiration.

Letting go of self-blame while living with chronic illness

If, like me, you have a chronic illness, have you ever sat with the thought that maybe you did something to cause it? I certainly have. Over the years, I’ve noticed that many conversations I’ve had with chronic illness friends landed on that question at some point. It’s that quiet,…

Knowing when and how to fill your cup with self-nurturing

We’ve heard it said that “you can’t pour from an empty cup.” It’s a reminder to “fill” ourselves before we “pour out” for someone else. Pouring out is an action we do to improve someone else’s life. That improvement could be momentary or it could affect them for a lifetime.

In dark moments with lupus, promise that you’ll fight for yourself

It’s so easy to jump on the woe-is-me, this-isn’t-fair, what-did-I-do-to-deserve-this bandwagon and shout, kick, and scream at the awful “bad luck” and horrible timing of chronic, incurable sickness.   Feeling like a victim and falling into grief can seem inescapable when unprovoked pain, flares of skin rashes, hair…

No one talks about the grief that chronic illness brings

Hey, friend, grab your tea and pull up a chair. I want to have an honest conversation about something we don’t talk about enough: grief. It’s not the kind of grief that comes with funerals and sympathy cards, but rather the quiet, sneaky kind that shows up when life doesn’t…

Putting my body on a performance improvement plan

As one year ends and another begins, many employers give job performance evaluations. That’s when, according to the Society for Human Resource Management, they or their supervisors commend workers for the impact they’ve made on the company and any recognizable or measurable outcomes they’ve helped produce. It’s also…