Hurricane in Heels — Kellie McRae

I was recently feeling a little tired but was still able to function. I went to breakfast with a friend on Saturday and struggled to sit up once I returned home. I lay down around 1 p.m. that afternoon and didn’t get up until Monday morning. Showering took what little…

I’m frustrated with my body that causes me considerable discomfort and uncertainty. Since my diagnosis, I’ve had an average of four hospital stays a year. I have done my best to avoid an admission this year. I don’t see my doctor as often as I should, but it’s not because…

Once upon a time, I was an adventurous eater. I looked forward to visiting new restaurants and trying their signature dishes. Along with a great meal, a glass of red wine was a must. Lupus changed all that. I was a surf-and-turf kind of girl. I loved lobster, and I…

At the end of 2015, my body was doing all kinds of strange things. I was caught in a revolving door at the hospital and seeing every specialist known to man. But no one could tell me what was wrong. On Jan. 1, 2016, I took a trip to Daytona…

I didn’t understand what depression was until lupus. Before my diagnosis, I would feel a little down occasionally and allow myself three days of a pity party before I’d say, “OK, solutions.” I would find an answer to whatever was bothering me or stop worrying about it. That was the…

I liked to read and write as a kid. I journaled often and wrote as if no one would ever read my thoughts. Sometimes they did, but that never stopped me from speaking my truth. I was boldly honest about what I felt or thought. I debated whether I should…

When I first started exhibiting symptoms of lupus, I was so worn out that I stayed in my apartment for months. I’d moved to a new town and had no connections there, so I would sit on my balcony with my cellphone and talk to people on social media. What…

When I was a kid, a popular party game was pin the tail on the donkey. I don’t know if children still play it, but here’s how it works: A picture of a donkey is hung on a tree or another vertical surface. Players take turns to wear a blindfold.

A lupus diagnosis affects more than just the patient. Spouses, children, close friends, and even co-workers are changed when a life-altering diagnosis is delivered. While the person with the disease has physical issues, their diagnosis has consequences for those around them. For example, a parent with small children won’t be…

For years, I have been chasing remission. In my mind, it was the pinnacle. I could envision low to no pain, newfound energy, and no more medications. It was like lupus utopia in my head. Someday, I would be told my bloodwork looked normal, reflecting “remission numbers.” Utopia, however,…

Has anyone ever told you that you should never meet your hero? We often have an idea of who that person is, and then when we meet them, we’re sorely disappointed. We’d hyped them up to be a perfect person. Then we discover a flawed human. The disappointment can be…

I’m sure you realize that someone who has been dubbed a “hurricane” is pretty unapologetic. Forces of nature sweep in, do what they do, and sweep out, never looking back. I was once a hurricane. Now I jokingly say I’ve gone from being a “Hurricane in Heels” to a “Tropical…