Love Yourself in Spite of Lupus

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by Kellie McRae |

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I recently shared with someone that Kellie had “died” and no one had bothered to bury her. Of course, I didn’t really mean that; I was just having a serious pity party.

I was in some major pain and needed someone to love me through my negativity. I am usually all happy and joyful, but sometimes I lose myself in the pain. I typically tell people that if I’m going to have a pity party, three days maximum is what I will allow. Then I simply must get over myself. So here’s how I do that:

  1. I start with some self-love and positive talk. I remind myself that I am healed, whole, filled with energy. I add some additional compliments like “Your hair looks pretty today” or “You’re smart and a blessing.”
  2. I remind myself of great contributions I’ve made to my life or the lives of others. Don’t skimp on what you think you’ve accomplished. If you sat and listened to a friend who was having a difficult time, you helped that person and that’s an accomplishment worthy of a pat on the back.
  3. I reward myself with something good to eat. I don’t usually reward myself with a bad snack. In fact, I often reward myself with something good and good. What do I mean by good and good? Vegan ice cream. It tastes good, and it’s good for you, so reward yourself.
  4. Shout out some awareness. You are a warrior, and people don’t always know the battle you’re up against. More importantly, many people don’t know the battle THEY are up against. Lupus can sometimes take years to be diagnosed. In fact, it is often misdiagnosed, so sharing awareness is showing love for others who may need your help in getting a diagnosis. I have had others tell me that by sharing my own struggles with lupus, they were able to finally get a proper diagnosis. Once this has happened to you, you’ll understand why this is on the list.
  5. Be grateful. Lupus sucks, but your loved ones can still tell you they love you. You still matter, you woke up this morning, and you have Internet (I know that, because you’re reading this article.) You feel good enough to want to read an article right now. See where I’m going? Be thankful, even if it;s for the little things.
  6. Avoid negativity. It drains me and it attracts more negativity. So let’s move on.
  7. Smile. Even if I don’t feel like it, I will look at myself in the mirror and plaster the goofiest smile on my face. After awhile, I start laughing and this lightens my load. Maybe it will help you feel lighter, too!

I hope these little tips help you feel some love for yourself. We all need to remember that we don’t always need others to show us love. Sometimes we need to take some time and show ourselves a little love.

Note: Lupus News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Lupus News Today, or its parent company, BioNews Services, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to lupus.