It’s no secret that living with lupus or other chronic illnesses often feels like a constant game of tug-of-war. One part of us aches to chase after our dreams, tackle projects, and seize life, while the other part is continually reminded of the need to slow down, conserve energy,…
Every day, and every minute of every day, systemic lupus erythematosus makes you sick. I get it. It’s not the reality that anyone plans for. It’s not some punishment for a supposed sin. Nor does it happen because we’ve intentionally exposed ourselves to toxins or malnourishment. Lupus. Sjögren’s…
Dating can be both a thrilling and nerve-wracking experience. Having a chronic condition certainly adds extra layers of complexity to the mix. I met my husband over 20 years ago, shortly after I was diagnosed with lupus. My illness was out of control at the time, so I was…
Earlier today, the speaker of a faith-based class I participated in was discussing the ancient Greek term “parakletos,” which meant “advocate.” My ears perked up, as advocacy has become such an integral part of my life. The speaker explained how the term also meant “helper, counselor, intercessor, or someone who…
Chronic illness can bring a variety of challenges and limitations into our lives that are out of our control. For me, one of those was my inability to have children of my own. That was a hard pill to swallow, and it took time for me to work through it…
Picture it: You’re deep in a lupus flare and have been in bed for weeks. In the silence, you think, “What is my purpose if I’m constantly sick?” or “How do I find meaning in my everyday life?” I can’t count how many times the frustration of being…
Sometimes I catch my partner, Felix, looking at me. He still looks at me the same way he did on our first date. His eyes shine as he dreamily gazes at me in a daze. When I catch him doing this, I just have to know what’s running through…
Third in a series. Read parts one and two. It’s been almost seven years since I was diagnosed with lupus. During that time, I’ve known many evolutions of myself, and each version of Kristiana has held a different outlook on love and life. We began…
Second in a series. Read part one. It was June 2016, and I remember unlocking my phone, opening up the Tinder dating app, and staring at the screen. Where to begin? Recently diagnosed with a chronic illness, I didn’t even know how to approach bringing someone new into…
First in a three-part series. Lupus, love, and I have always shared a complicated relationship, as my diagnosis came not long after my first real breakup. In the chaos of having my heart broken, I poured every ounce of my strength into putting on a brave face for…