I’ve been procrastinating writing this column for a couple of days now. Partly because my heart doesn’t want to, and partly because I don’t know how to begin to say goodbye. As I pen my final farewell, I’m feeling emotional. But given how many nights I’ve spent teary-eyed, pouring my feelings out to you all in the past, I guess it’s only fitting.
It’s hard to explain the emotions that are running through my head at the moment. There is a small amount of sadness, after all, this is the end of a pivotal era in my life. An era that began with lupus and the life-altering struggle that came with my very first flare. But over time, this column and community have become my solace and safe haven. For four and a half years, this has been a collaborative effort with every one of you to build something bigger than lupus.
Behind the sadness lies overwhelming gratitude. I’m so grateful to have been part of the Lupus News Today team. For me, this job has been equal parts therapy and liberation, and it has been instrumental in my evolution. I could not be who I am today without this opportunity or without getting to share my life with all of you. You have changed my life beyond comprehension.
In the beginning, I had no idea how many people I would reach. I felt like I was screaming my struggle into a void. You couldn’t imagine my surprise when the void started talking back, agreeing, and echoing my sentiments. And that’s because it had never been a void at all, I had never been alone in my struggle, I only felt like I was.
In my years writing this column, one thing stands out to me: No matter what type of chronic illness we have, we all know the feeling of crippling isolation. We each know how it feels to be fundamentally different from the wider world. We know what it’s like to be an outcast in a society of “normal.” And the cure is to talk, share, and cry over our struggles and heartache — together.
Together, we are the cure to the virus that is isolation and loneliness. Together we are each other’s reminder that not one of us is alone. We bear the torch that shines light into darkness. But the work doesn’t end with the conclusion of my column. It’s still your job to carry that fire to as many other warriors as you can.
The last emotion I feel is contentment. I am wholeheartedly at peace with where I leave this column. I never imagined where this journey would take me, or how many people I would meet along the way. To everyone who has been along for the ride with me, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much!
Sharing my life with you has truly been an honor and a joy, but now it’s time for new adventures.
If you wish to get in touch or keep up with what I’m doing, you can message or follow me on Instagram @kristianapage.
Hope your wolf is playing along nicely!
“The Girl Who Cried Wolf “
Note: Lupus News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Lupus News Today, or its parent company, BioNews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to lupus.
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